Confidence In Christ

I've spent my whole life feeling inferior and inadequate.
Always trying to "live up" to others expectation.
Even when i was good at things and received praise for  it my joy and confidence was robbed by guilt and fear that I was a bad person because being good and excelling = pride = bad.
So I sabotaged myself (ring a true to anyone else?); I avoided situations/experiences/life, isolated from the people who loved me, distracted from my negative feelings in unhealthy ways, and eventually ended up in such a deep dark hole of depression and anxiety that nothing seemed "right"
If I talked to one person i was being mean and neglecting everyone else, if i watched t.v. or read a book i was selfish and lazy, if i tried to write/journal/facebook/etc. i stressed out so much about writing the "right" thing that i ended up avoiding it altogether and dont even get me started about school stress

ugh

So I read a chapter out of "The Purpose Driven Life" today called Understanding your shape  and it really put all this stress anxiety and worry about abilities into perspective. It was an amazing chapter about how each member of the body of Christ is unique, and that we were made to use the talents, abilities, skills, and the personality Christ gave us to serve in our own way. Whether its a stereotypical, obvious avenue of service (pastoral, missionary, etc.) or not anything can be done for Gods glory. I liked how Rick Warren put it when he said "What i'm able to do, God wants me to do... and it feels good to do what God made you to do"
How encouraging is that! We dont have to worry and stress about "doing everything" He created us just the way we are to serve him in our own special way that noone else can. As it says in 1 Corinthians 12:6 "Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit;and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord;and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good."


We all have different gifts yet the Holy Spirit is present throughout all of them!!


And it doesnt have to be anything super fancy, exciting, powerful, groundbreaking, or "Religous". Our everyday daily activities can be an act of worship and satisfaction.

"Whether you eat or drink do it all for the glory of God"
1 Corinthians 10:31

So take that Legalistic, negative, condemning, inferior thoughts!
No matter what i do i can praise God, (apart from sin obviously)
But even if i do something i think is glorifying God and the Holy Spirit reveals to me I sinned, It's ok I'm forgiven! God is soooo gracious praise him! I can choose to learn and live a more satisfying life from that experience.
so you know what?!?!?!

Im done trying to fit into the molds that people want to place me into. I will not be labeled in any other way. The only labels i will accept are the ones Christ has placed upon me. ( new creation, child of God, more than a conquerer, free from sin and death, forgiven, redeemed, declared not guilty/condemned, temple of the Holy Spirit, ambassador, strong, loving, of sound and peaceful mind, etc.)
 I will be strong in who he says i am and i will not fall back into making others comfortable by conforming into a "socially acceptable" "worldly" lifestyle and attitude

I'm going to live out my faith using MY God given talents, abilities, and personality and stop trying to "conform to the ways of this world..."

Whos with me?